Back when the Internet was a wee little thing and was thought of simply as an online encyclopedia tool for nerds and not regular folks, there came a gift sent from above in the form of an AOL CD in which 100 free use hours were bestowed upon you and your computer to "surf the net" or "chat about hobbies".
100 hours of non-charged time...how in the world could one person use up 100 hours?
That was my very thought as I inserted the disc and found that no matter where I went, I could always find porn (and verily Elizabeth did find happiness in the most degrading horrific pornography she could find, which she would boot up at parties to terrify her guests when it was time for them to go home).
But while I was in my late teens/early twenties when the beginnings of the Internet began to flare up and had no problem adapting to it thanks to the many hours spent on my Mac Classic, kids themselves were still too young to know just what was laying in wait for them once they shot themselves into the series of tubes that constructed the information superhighway.
So they turned to the two people they thought would guide them, Mom and Dad...which is ironic because if there are two people who would have known less about technology it would be the people who grew up listening to radio plays and were unable to grasp the concept of call-waiting on the touch-tone house phone.
And because Mom and Dad were idiots about the Internet, they themselves turned to VHS tapes that were chock full of learnin' so that they could go back to doing whatever it was that parents did before realizing they could cheat on their spouse virtually online.
So here it is my friends, the very VHS tape that parents and teachers set kids in front of to learn ALL ABOUT THE INTERNET before they realized what, exactly, one could really find on the Internet.
Video after the break.