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You’re fat and lazy

I am not thin.

 Hell, if I had to pick a shape that would best resemble my body type it would probably be something between a potato and a bean bag chair. But let me make something perfectly clear, while I enjoy wearing elastic-banded pants so that I can continue guzzling beer by the quart without having to face reality, I can fit into a pair of jeans just fine (provided of course that they are made with some kind of stretch material).

Having said that, there are days when I can actually hear the fat sloshing around inside my body and I feel the need to put down that can of frosting and go for a walk (but then I lay back down until that feeling passes).

If only I had my own personal robot weight-loss coach with HUGE FUCKING EYES to build up my self-esteem and show me the way to thinville.

Well now there is!

Introducing Autom (pronounced: autumn) a scary-ass robot that allows you to input your food intake so that she can tell you that you should probably stop eating Ring Dings by the case while watching a Scrubs marathon on Netflix.

Isn’t it helpful to give all your power and common sense to a robot who will probably become sentient after a thunderstorm and terrorize you by locking your pudgy ass down in the basement for a month?

Video of Autom after the break.

Source: Red Ferret

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