|You Are Not The Boss Of Me!|
Every morning I wake up and give thanks to the birth control Gods that I have managed to reach the age of 39 without plopping out a child of my own.
But there is nothing more annoying to my ears than that of children singing or a teenager making a noise that sounds suspiciously like duuuhhhh after I have helpfully schooled them on the musical styling of New Kids on the Block.
Now, since I am a learned woman (who has managed to drop out of some of the country’s most prestigious Community Colleges, I might add) I feel it is my duty to help other adults (both parents and non-parents) decipher those annoying noises that escape from the throats and mouths of people aged 13-18 who still live at home, via an article by James Harbeck of The Week, who manages to decipher such things as voiceless labialized uvular fricative or, a “grunting snot inhale” that boys make for no apparent reason and the creaky-voiced long alveolar glide with mid front unrounded vowel and glottal stop which results in a snarky, sarcastic “yeah” that kids at the age of sixteen tend to vocalize whenever you remind them that they are not the center of the universe and if they touch your fucking push pops one more time you’re going to break their face.
If you don’t have time to read the article (or are illiterate, I make no judgments) Mr. Harbeck has kindly made a video demonstrating a phonetic description of those annoying teenage sounds which appears after the break.