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Sleep With NIC CAGE

I’m not even going to bother writing up a little something about the Nic Cage Pillowcase being offered for sale on Amazon, because words alone cannot capture the magic and eroticisicm of drooling into the ironed-on mouth of one Mr, Cage.

Instead I’m going to allow verified Amazon Purchaser, Adam Popovich, describe his own experiences with the pillowcase as proof that there is dark magic working against humanity when it comes to Nicolas Cage.

As a consummate Nicolas Cage fan, I decided on a whim to purchase this pillowcase, thinking it would be funny. The pillowcase arrived quickly enough, in an unassuming, small package. I opened it up and immediately found myself compelled to wear it as a mask, putting Nicolas Cage’s face as my own. I began laughing as this mirrored in a sense, the basic idea and concept of Face/Off, one of my favorite Nicolas Cage films. Strangely, when I attempted to photograph the pillowcase, it won’t show up properly. Every attempt to photograph it results in the photo being bizarrely dimmed, as if all the light in the room was being sucked away from the pillowcase. Initially I found this a glitch in the camera I was using, and chalked it up to coincidence. 


After one night of sleeping on Nic Cage pillow, pachinko dreams commenced. Any hardcore fan of Nicolas Cage knows about his extensive love of pachinko, and his many commercials filmed in Japan, expressly for pachinko companies. I have never had any interest in pachinko in my entire life, yet now I find myself thinking of it every minute of every waking day. I can’t stop thinking about pachinko, and I can’t stop holding this pillowcase, now housing my very own pillow. It comforts me, makes me believe the world is a good place. Tonight I shall rest on it again, and who knows what dreams may come? 


All in all, it’s a pretty good pillowcase, but it may harbor the dark magicks of the universe that Nicolas Cage is an avatar for. I’m not sure.

Source: Dangerous Minds

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