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F*CK YOU SNOW…Seriously, F*ck You A Lot

Right now I am watching yet another foot of snow fall from the sky in a blizzard-like fashion while my neighbor across the street (whom I can barely see due to the thickness of the snowfall) has gone mad and is trying to beat back the fluffy carnage with a snow blower so that he won’t have to shovel(which he will, there’s no way this fight against mother nature is going to end well for him).

That madness, I fear, has infected everyone where I live and I wouldn’t be a bit surprised at all if one of us (I include myself in this prophecy) finally cracks all together and kills half the home owners on the street, resulting in a macabre tableau of “snow people” (all Calvin and Hobbes-style) made from the bloody corpses of their neighbors. In fact, I almost welcome it…for I am totally done with Winter. 

Now, there are others, those who live in the warmth and the sun all year long who look upon the falling crystallization of rain and see not oppressiveness and isolation, but beauty and quiet, and for that I should slap them with all my might. For once I was one of them. Oh yes, I spent Decembers and Januarys and Februarys in shorts and flip-flops, skipping though the rays of warm sunshine the way one might do through sprinklers in summers and wondered what it would be like to taste a solitary snowflake on my tongue.

And you know what? IT’S FUCKING OVERRATED!

Wanna know what it’s actually like to wake up day-in-and-day-out seeing nothing but bleak whiteness constantly falling to the ground? Then watch the following video…stare at it for its entire hour long run, then loop it back to the beginning and watch it all over again. Do it until all the darkness inside of you seeps through your being and the only thing you really want to do is set fire to your home and watch the snow melt away like clear blood.

And after you’re done, tell me how pretty it is…oh please tell me how pretty it is.

Video after the break.

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