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The THUG COOKBOOK: Learn To Eat Like You Give A F*ck

I drink a lot, so I’ve made a deal with my body that if it won’t kill me for slamming down some questionable beer choices (like Voodoo Doughnut Pretzel, Raspberry & Chocolate Ale) then I will fill it with good, homemade food that will hopefully allow me to live to the ripe old age of 45. Unfortunately with that promise comes a lot of bullshit health recipes filled with ingredients poor people like me could never afford and delivered via a pretentious fucking tone that makes me want to binge-eat a box of Devil Dogs.

But thanks to Thug Kitchen I now have the capacity to make food like Quinoa Oatmeal without feeling all Gwyneth Paltrow-ish because…well, this:

And, if you become a subscriber to the website and/or purchase the new Thug Kitchen Cookbook, you’ll be Consciously Uncoupling with your packet of dried Quaker Oatmeal shit too (and no, I wasn’t paid for this surprisingly positive review…although I’m not opposed to the idea of being Thug Kitchen’s bitch since they are the only ones who got me to eat Brussels sprouts without vomiting).

If you are interested in trying to reverse the effects of your drug use, binge-drinking or spray tanning then a diet filled with some Mother Fucking healthy food might help you live longer (and might just stop your constant beer/meth butt). But don’t listen to me, after the break is some seriously scientific reasons (via an inspired book trailer) on why you should give the Thug Kitchen a try.

Seriously, your teeth tell me you probably need this.


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