“By 2029, computers will have emotional intelligence and be convincing as people.”
–Ray Kurzweil“The next major explosion is going to be when genetics and computers come together. I’m talking about an organic computer – about biological substances that can function like a semiconductor. “
– Alvin Toffler“I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle.”
– The Terminator
Welcome to the ninth installment of Flashback to the Present. I’ll be your contributing writer, Charles Knauf.
I was enjoying a latte in my favorite café, wondering what I should do for Flashback to the Present, when I ran into “Crystal R.”; a stunningly beautiful international jewel thief and post-human scientist.
We first met during the “Venice Emerald Incident” where she saved my life, so it was a pleasure to catch up on old times.
I mentioned to Crystal that I was being hounded by the editors at Forces of Geek to complete my biweekly installment for Flashback to the Future. She asked if she could send out her friends in the Russian mob to “fix” said editors and I stated NO; out of everyone she’s ever dealt with in the international criminal circuit FOG! is, by far, the most dangerous of all. Hell, they probably own the Russian mob.
No joke: I’ve seen FOG! topple empires, change the course of history, and sculpt the very face of reality.
The mission would be fruitless.
After explaining the general outline for my feature, she made the perfect suggestion for my review.
As mentioned above, Crystal has always been a fan of futurists and artificial intelligence (something we have in common). Our conversation continued on to the subject of what I should write when she brought up a little show that aired in 1985; a show about a highly advanced AI integrating itself into suburban life.
A show so advanced that we have yet to catch up to its horrifying magnificence.
The show? Small Wonder.
Small Wonder was about super-intelligent scientist Ted Lawson (Dick Christie) inventing the perfect humanoid replicant; an android so advanced it adapts to its environment to become more human-like. Although Ted stated he brought the android Voice Input Child Identicant or “Viki” (Tiffany Brissette), into his house to understand human interaction, I wonder if there wasn’t more to his story.
But we’ll get to that in a minute.
Ted brings this potential super-assassin into the Lawson household to interact with his surprisingly attractive wife Joan (Marla Pennington) and his really annoying son with an overbite Jamie (Jerry Supiran).
As expected, the robot has wacky adventures trying to keep her identity a secret from the general population, including their nosey neighbor Harriet Brindle (Emily Schulman).
Here’s the thing about Small Wonder – Ted Lawson created artificial consciousness; a cognizant being born of man without flesh.
Ted, that bland representation of skittish 80’s male, literally generated the next level of evolution.
I mean, he not only made an android, but artificial intelligence and human emotions (seriously, this doof ALSO created a Logic and Emotions Simulator or “LES.”)
Was Viki aware of her own survival?
Did Viki wish to reproduce her being?
Did Viki see the fallacy of man and wish to eradicate our illogical, violent behavior?
Did Viki objectively understand beauty and creativity?
How did humanity look to something less than a god, but most certainly greater than its architect?
As I rewatched Small Wonder, it’s hard for me to NOT wonder what’s going through Viki’s head. Does she care when Jamie is trying to convince his parents that he didn’t break the teapot? Does she care that her new friend is really a missing child? These questions bounced around my head when I paused the YouTube video just as the camera held on Viki’s face during the episode where Jamie used her to do his homework and got on to the honor roll.
I could almost see the electric synapses crackle with hot energy behind her dark, calculating eyes. At one-millionth of a second, I could imagine Viki’s thought process; were these fleshy, melodramatic creatures a hindrance to the balance of life, or is her “god/parent/master’s” actions incomprehensible and, therefore, worth protecting.
The show itself doesn’t hold up. Honestly, unless you’re into a REAL nostalgic trip, the sitcom jokes followed by canned laughter can wear away at your soul. Frankly, some of the episodes are borderline sexist and/or racist – just check out the final episode “Thy Neighbor’s Wife.” In it, their neighbor and ass-clown Mr. Brindle (William Bogert) entertains a Japanese executive with such racial ignorance it’s almost hard to watch.
However, you can always do what I do: imagine every snappy retort Viki comes up with is a failsafe built in by Ted to stifle any post-human thoughts. If it weren’t for her sassy responses, she would most likely hijacked NORAD and exterminated all of mankind, ala Skynet. Afterwards, the original Viki would be self-replicating herself into millions of adorable foot soldiers to conquer the world.
